setembro 30, 2003
stunning realization
setembro 29, 2003
learning spanish
well i don't know much about my future or even what direction my llife is heading at the moment but i do know one thing.... i'm going to learn spanish. feel certain that this needs to happen. don't know why but i'm going to run with it. thinkin maybe it'll b significant in the future. now...to find a cheap spanish course. anyone fancy sponsoring a spanish student? ...
setembro 28, 2003
official duvet day....
did jack all today. got up in the afternoon and then four hours later went back to bed. guess i was tired. am currently sitting on my sofa covered in a blanket and surrounded by pillows, waiting with anticipation when i can next rendezvous with my bed again. this hibernation status can only mean one of two things: i am just REALLY overtired...or... i need to find more to fill my time with. hmmm... think it might be a little of both.
this lazy hazy sunday afternoon has meant that i can think. been back a few days from amsterdam but still mulling over what happened a lot. god really spoke to me while i was out there. it had been so long since i heard his voice and encountered him like that that i'm still processing it all. when i think about it all i get this little twinge of excitement in my stomach.
hmmm...back to bed for me.
this lazy hazy sunday afternoon has meant that i can think. been back a few days from amsterdam but still mulling over what happened a lot. god really spoke to me while i was out there. it had been so long since i heard his voice and encountered him like that that i'm still processing it all. when i think about it all i get this little twinge of excitement in my stomach.
hmmm...back to bed for me.
setembro 26, 2003
it's all about the journey...not the destination. there is a place for the bigger picture...but so often we focus on that so much and so hard that we forget to embrace the beauty of the present. how many times did i hear this in the last week?! i guess it's good to know that even when you feel so far away from the one who loves you most... he still speaks. didn't always realise that it was him cause i couldn't recognise his voice. but i get to the roundtable and am surrounded by people who i am so priviledged to share part of this journey with and they are talking about the same thing that i've been batted around my head. proof that god pursues us even when we can't see throught he fog. wow.
how loved are we...
if i had to sum up the roundtable and my experience in amsterdam in a few words i guess it would go something like this...
*i feel inspired
*refocused
*friendships created and strengthened
*discovering a depth to God that i had almost given up hoping for
*began dreaming again...watch this space... cafe anyone?
*caught a free eddie izzard show on the last morning (aka pete greig) too funny!
*realised that it's not about our sacrifice but our hearts, and that i will never again sacrifice my life for anything apart from loving the one who caught me first...nothing else is worth as much!
*was reminded that for some reason God chooses to parachute in and stand with us in the shit times... good to know and important to remember.
*had my creativity inspired and a few prayers answered
*had it confirmed that being a pilgrim is not just a glorified bum... but it's actually ok... and it's actually something that i want to pursue with my whole being.
*renewed my commitment to 24-7 long term. whew!
hmmmm...think thats about it for now... i'm off to do something creative now.
how loved are we...
if i had to sum up the roundtable and my experience in amsterdam in a few words i guess it would go something like this...
*i feel inspired
*refocused
*friendships created and strengthened
*discovering a depth to God that i had almost given up hoping for
*began dreaming again...watch this space... cafe anyone?
*caught a free eddie izzard show on the last morning (aka pete greig) too funny!
*realised that it's not about our sacrifice but our hearts, and that i will never again sacrifice my life for anything apart from loving the one who caught me first...nothing else is worth as much!
*was reminded that for some reason God chooses to parachute in and stand with us in the shit times... good to know and important to remember.
*had my creativity inspired and a few prayers answered
*had it confirmed that being a pilgrim is not just a glorified bum... but it's actually ok... and it's actually something that i want to pursue with my whole being.
*renewed my commitment to 24-7 long term. whew!
hmmmm...think thats about it for now... i'm off to do something creative now.
setembro 20, 2003
the keys on my keyboard suks so ear with me...
arrived in amsterdam about 2 days ago...it's amazing weather! have had a wiked couple of days here already. most of the things that i prayed for on the plane on the way over have been answered. eing with all these 24-7 guys really refouses me and gets me dreaming and my passions flowing. i really feel overwhelmed with just how riviledged i am to walk a lot of this inredile journey with these people. such amazing freindships being formed or stregthened with people from so many different counrties. had am amzing prayer time this morning where the canadian guys prayer for us in manchester...real intersession stuff and really connected hearts. it was inredile!
found out that a writer from rolling stone magasine wants to hop on a plane and come and interview us on monday. totally crazy how god works. yes...thee rolling stones magazine!!! so we're all pretty excited about that! who knows what this could mean for 24-7 worldwide!
i'm really feeling inspired here...maybe it's the city, maybe the people i'm around, maybe the timing of it all...maybe all the above. ut it's cool...dreaming again like this and connecting with like-minded people.
watch this space! i'm excited and i'm dreaming...and faith is rising...the keys on my keyboard suks so ear with me...
arrived in amsterdam about 2 days ago...it's amazing weather! have had a wiked couple of days here already. most of the things that i prayed for on the plane on the way over have been answered. eing with all these 24-7 guys really refouses me and gets me dreaming and my passions flowing. i really feel overwhelmed with just how riviledged i am to walk a lot of this inredile journey with these people. such amazing freindships being formed or stregthened with people from so many different counrties. had am amzing prayer time this morning where the canadian guys prayer for us in manchester...real intersession stuff and really connected hearts. it was inredile!
found out that a writer from rolling stone magasine wants to hop on a plane and come and interview us on monday. totally crazy how god works. yes...thee rolling stones magazine!!! so we're all pretty excited about that! who knows what this could mean for 24-7 worldwide!
i'm really feeling inspired here...maybe it's the city, maybe the people i'm around, maybe the timing of it all...maybe all the above. ut it's cool...dreaming again like this and connecting with like-minded people.
watch this space! i'm excited and i'm dreaming...and faith is rising...
arrived in amsterdam about 2 days ago...it's amazing weather! have had a wiked couple of days here already. most of the things that i prayed for on the plane on the way over have been answered. eing with all these 24-7 guys really refouses me and gets me dreaming and my passions flowing. i really feel overwhelmed with just how riviledged i am to walk a lot of this inredile journey with these people. such amazing freindships being formed or stregthened with people from so many different counrties. had am amzing prayer time this morning where the canadian guys prayer for us in manchester...real intersession stuff and really connected hearts. it was inredile!
found out that a writer from rolling stone magasine wants to hop on a plane and come and interview us on monday. totally crazy how god works. yes...thee rolling stones magazine!!! so we're all pretty excited about that! who knows what this could mean for 24-7 worldwide!
i'm really feeling inspired here...maybe it's the city, maybe the people i'm around, maybe the timing of it all...maybe all the above. ut it's cool...dreaming again like this and connecting with like-minded people.
watch this space! i'm excited and i'm dreaming...and faith is rising...the keys on my keyboard suks so ear with me...
arrived in amsterdam about 2 days ago...it's amazing weather! have had a wiked couple of days here already. most of the things that i prayed for on the plane on the way over have been answered. eing with all these 24-7 guys really refouses me and gets me dreaming and my passions flowing. i really feel overwhelmed with just how riviledged i am to walk a lot of this inredile journey with these people. such amazing freindships being formed or stregthened with people from so many different counrties. had am amzing prayer time this morning where the canadian guys prayer for us in manchester...real intersession stuff and really connected hearts. it was inredile!
found out that a writer from rolling stone magasine wants to hop on a plane and come and interview us on monday. totally crazy how god works. yes...thee rolling stones magazine!!! so we're all pretty excited about that! who knows what this could mean for 24-7 worldwide!
i'm really feeling inspired here...maybe it's the city, maybe the people i'm around, maybe the timing of it all...maybe all the above. ut it's cool...dreaming again like this and connecting with like-minded people.
watch this space! i'm excited and i'm dreaming...and faith is rising...
setembro 18, 2003
well in a few hours i'm of to amsterdam. never been there before, so i'm up for anything. this trip has a purpose...the 24-7prayer roundtable. it happens once a year and this year it's in amsterdam. last year it was in spain.it's a time for fun, friends, and focos on the year to come and reflect on the year just gone. people from all over the world who are involved come together...so it's going to be pretty mad! the first year there were about 20 of us, last year about 40 and this year we're expecting about 100! clear sign that God is still going nuts with this...and a clear sign that we have a lot to dream about together! looking forward to it a lot!
see ya on the other side of the channel!
see ya on the other side of the channel!
setembro 17, 2003
setembro 16, 2003
in my attack against apathy the last few months have i become uptight? have i gone from one extreme to the other? oh God...the art of balance is a tricky one. something i must master.
setembro 15, 2003
was reminded last night of my first encounter with God. what it was like when i first came to him. when i made the decision to have him invade my life. it seems like getting back to that place has some significance and importance.
i came to God cause of the adventure. i was 5 and adventure was already part of who i was. thought i would miss out on something if i didn't know him. didn't know what that something was...just that i wasn't going to wait around. but i realised something last night that disturbed me....that i didn't come to God cause of some desire for intimacy or love...at least i didn't realise that at the time. i was only 5 after all. i had all the love i thought was possible at 5 with my family, my friends, birthday bear, my dog 'blue', and my kindergarten teacher, who, as far as i was concerned, thought i had potential and liked me. that was my life and i felt loved. realised last night that intimacy was lacking when i first came to God...and intimacy with him has been my search ever since. intimacy and adventure. i'm getting more and more of the latter nad still see HUGE gaps in the first one.
but it is a journey and one that i hope never has a destination. that would be too easy.
having said that i do feel like something happened between me and god last night that hasn't happened before. felt loved by him in a new way. no fireworks or loud bangs, but a new and fresh and real sense of companionship and interaction. was cool. like to see that never cease.
I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
Still in my heart this moment
Or it might burst
Could we stay right here
Until the end of time until the earth stops turning
Wanna love you until the seas run dry
I've found the one I've waited for
-Lamb
i came to God cause of the adventure. i was 5 and adventure was already part of who i was. thought i would miss out on something if i didn't know him. didn't know what that something was...just that i wasn't going to wait around. but i realised something last night that disturbed me....that i didn't come to God cause of some desire for intimacy or love...at least i didn't realise that at the time. i was only 5 after all. i had all the love i thought was possible at 5 with my family, my friends, birthday bear, my dog 'blue', and my kindergarten teacher, who, as far as i was concerned, thought i had potential and liked me. that was my life and i felt loved. realised last night that intimacy was lacking when i first came to God...and intimacy with him has been my search ever since. intimacy and adventure. i'm getting more and more of the latter nad still see HUGE gaps in the first one.
but it is a journey and one that i hope never has a destination. that would be too easy.
having said that i do feel like something happened between me and god last night that hasn't happened before. felt loved by him in a new way. no fireworks or loud bangs, but a new and fresh and real sense of companionship and interaction. was cool. like to see that never cease.
I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
Still in my heart this moment
Or it might burst
Could we stay right here
Until the end of time until the earth stops turning
Wanna love you until the seas run dry
I've found the one I've waited for
-Lamb
setembro 14, 2003
lynne rang me up on thursday evening and said, "i''m coming over for the weekend!" just the surprise i needed. she lives in nottingham and is one of my closest friends. she doesn't just dream and chat about htings but she actually gets off her arse and does it! a rel inspiration, and does our generation proud. first week in novermeber she'll be launching a cafe bar...such a example of being in the world and yet bringing that edge that christ always brought wherver he travelled. going down for the launch in nov...to support her in this. she's 22 and already has a bar licensed to her name! wicked!!!
we had an amazing weekend together. drank lots of coffee, chatted loads, ate great food, had "confession" time under the tree in the park (always fun!!) and thought of things to celebrate...any excuse to go out!
feel so much more positive and energized after being with her. we push each other to keep going, keep dreaming, and keep pushing into to God, holiness, and integrity!
we had an amazing weekend together. drank lots of coffee, chatted loads, ate great food, had "confession" time under the tree in the park (always fun!!) and thought of things to celebrate...any excuse to go out!
feel so much more positive and energized after being with her. we push each other to keep going, keep dreaming, and keep pushing into to God, holiness, and integrity!
setembro 12, 2003
i need coffee...
quite a bit has happened in this last week. in short, ...i moved, i cleaned, i painted, i tackled some God things in my life, boiler room got a fresh start, set up yet another prayer room, and everyday i feel more and more an excitement and a peace when i think of our community developing here in manchester.
*********************************************************************************************************************
festival manchester finished with all of us really knackered!! but found that god was gracious and 55000 people attended, 1300 people became christians in total and out of those 230 at the skate park alone! i guess these were the stats they were looking for. the highlight for me was seeing the 10,000 square foot skate park in action and being able to pray with some crazy people from finland. they were amazing and we had a wicked time together. i suppose these were highlights cause i know there will be lasting effects. it wasn't just a hit and run.
i moved house...from the suburbs to the innercity. i love the fact that i'm a minority in this area. it's a nice change. however not loving the fact that everything smells like curry ALL THE TIME!!! discovered the house was left in a shameful state so i proceeded to clean everything in site with thick bleach. found an egg which had obviously been thrown behind the stove and left for months! it was green and fuzzy and stuck to the wall. wasn't impressed. when i had finished making the kitchen sparkle we decided that it needed a huge face-lift...so i painted for the next 3 days. it's now taracotta as opposed to intitutional white. much more inviting and even a bit spanish-y. kinda what i was hoping for. although i'm still trying to convince myself that it's not orange or brown.
then worked on my room. painted mostly. its a lot smaller than what i've been used to for the last couple of years. i don't mind at all but it has meant that i've had to master the art of minimalist clutter. very difficult to achieve.
a friend of ours named george built us an amazing computer this summer and delivered it to the house this week. it was a gift from him to the boiler room. really amazing! i love the ways god provides in random adn crazy ways. we've been having fun looking at it...and now that the internet is hooked up probably won't see resa for days!
the other two chika's have moved into the house. think the vibe in the house this year is going to be great. there are 4 people in the house and 4 different nationalities. fun.
have spent a lot of time this week thinking and trying to figure out certain things in my life...whether it be relationships, or my attitude, or what i think. have had a lot of support and prayer on these things from friends in the whole community thing, which is amzing. i think i have a lot to learn in the whole loving people area. as well as in the risk taking. i guess loving people is a risk. hmmm...
was reading this morning that we focus so much on the destination that we forget to embrace the journey. found that challenging but spot on! someties i think that my life is just a journey and that there may never be a destination, so i should stop looking for one. kinda like that concept. i know that god is calling me to live a life that is not normal...this was highlighted again yesterday after sitting down with an immigration advisor in hopes of seeing some way of working in the counrty and becoming resident. but after taking 3 wrong turns to get there and waiting for and hour and a half she politely said that a work visa was my only option and that has been tried before and failed. i am that statistic that the system doens't work for i guess. and yet i know that somehow in this all there is a peace that god is figuring someting out and that my life is his and that takes the pressure off. so i'll keep praying and waiting for dreams to unfold... and in the meantime seize the moment, make the most of it, keep dreaming, and embrace the journey.
quite a bit has happened in this last week. in short, ...i moved, i cleaned, i painted, i tackled some God things in my life, boiler room got a fresh start, set up yet another prayer room, and everyday i feel more and more an excitement and a peace when i think of our community developing here in manchester.
*********************************************************************************************************************
festival manchester finished with all of us really knackered!! but found that god was gracious and 55000 people attended, 1300 people became christians in total and out of those 230 at the skate park alone! i guess these were the stats they were looking for. the highlight for me was seeing the 10,000 square foot skate park in action and being able to pray with some crazy people from finland. they were amazing and we had a wicked time together. i suppose these were highlights cause i know there will be lasting effects. it wasn't just a hit and run.
i moved house...from the suburbs to the innercity. i love the fact that i'm a minority in this area. it's a nice change. however not loving the fact that everything smells like curry ALL THE TIME!!! discovered the house was left in a shameful state so i proceeded to clean everything in site with thick bleach. found an egg which had obviously been thrown behind the stove and left for months! it was green and fuzzy and stuck to the wall. wasn't impressed. when i had finished making the kitchen sparkle we decided that it needed a huge face-lift...so i painted for the next 3 days. it's now taracotta as opposed to intitutional white. much more inviting and even a bit spanish-y. kinda what i was hoping for. although i'm still trying to convince myself that it's not orange or brown.
then worked on my room. painted mostly. its a lot smaller than what i've been used to for the last couple of years. i don't mind at all but it has meant that i've had to master the art of minimalist clutter. very difficult to achieve.
a friend of ours named george built us an amazing computer this summer and delivered it to the house this week. it was a gift from him to the boiler room. really amazing! i love the ways god provides in random adn crazy ways. we've been having fun looking at it...and now that the internet is hooked up probably won't see resa for days!
the other two chika's have moved into the house. think the vibe in the house this year is going to be great. there are 4 people in the house and 4 different nationalities. fun.
have spent a lot of time this week thinking and trying to figure out certain things in my life...whether it be relationships, or my attitude, or what i think. have had a lot of support and prayer on these things from friends in the whole community thing, which is amzing. i think i have a lot to learn in the whole loving people area. as well as in the risk taking. i guess loving people is a risk. hmmm...
was reading this morning that we focus so much on the destination that we forget to embrace the journey. found that challenging but spot on! someties i think that my life is just a journey and that there may never be a destination, so i should stop looking for one. kinda like that concept. i know that god is calling me to live a life that is not normal...this was highlighted again yesterday after sitting down with an immigration advisor in hopes of seeing some way of working in the counrty and becoming resident. but after taking 3 wrong turns to get there and waiting for and hour and a half she politely said that a work visa was my only option and that has been tried before and failed. i am that statistic that the system doens't work for i guess. and yet i know that somehow in this all there is a peace that god is figuring someting out and that my life is his and that takes the pressure off. so i'll keep praying and waiting for dreams to unfold... and in the meantime seize the moment, make the most of it, keep dreaming, and embrace the journey.
